The Duck & Rice: Duck The Detox
Sometimes, you can't beat the old ways of doing things!
To beat the January trend of green smoothie detoxing and spin classes, The Duck & Rice partnered with Pilsner Urquell to giveaway 500 litres of tank beer to all their lovely customers during lunch service!
How did we promote this delicious offer? We created the Duck The Detox newspaper, a craftily written & gloriously designed newspaper, announcing all the wonderful delights that come with ducking the detox and beating the January blues.
The Duck & Rice can exclusively reveal that this January will be awash with free pints of Pilsner Urquell with every lunchtime booking.
Amid heightened speculation that Londoners will be coaxed into drinking broccoli smoothies and join an intimidatingly cool gym in 2018, The Duck & Rice has extended a friendly arm of comfort to those seeking alternative forms of personal improvement.
Rita Martalena, General Manager of The Duck & Rice, said “Sadly we see this every year, people feeling guilt over their festive indulgence and looking for repentance through coconut water and spinning classes. It doesn’t have to be this way. A warming katsu curry and a pint of fresh Pilsner will resolve most things in life.”
Excitement over this new approach to January blues has created a stir amongst Berwick Street locals, with one market trader asking “So what, I call up, make a booking, and everyone gets a free pint of Pilsner? That’s crazy.”
Although a major reason to be cheerful in the new year, Duck the Detox has not inspired positive feedback from everyone. A disgruntled spokesperson for Kale Group International posted the following statement, “Although we know kale tastes like old compost, we do not want to see the millions of pounds we have paid on marketing our product to millennials go to waste. We would therefore urge anyone looking to genuinely enjoy what they consume to avoid The Duck & Rice this January. Particularly the yakitori chicken.”
Those booking The Duck & Rice this January can order from a delicious selection of dim sum, including venison puffs, crispy duck rolls, scallop shumai and char siu buns. Mouthwatering main dishes include Japanese aubergine and tofu claypot, crispy duck fried rice, black pepper mock chicken, sweet & sour pork rice, and chicken katsu curry.
In an incredibly rare information leak by Buckingham Palace, it has become public that the Queen inquired as to whether her corgis would be able to join her during a lunchtime booking. The Duck & Rice was able to confirm that all well behaved dogs are welcome in the downstairs pub, including those of a royal standing.
It is unknown at this point in time when in January her majesty will be attending for lunch, but an inside source has said she is a particular fan of the jasmine smoked pork ribs, “Even if they do get a bit messy”.
With free pints of Pilsner, delicious food, and rumours of royal corgi visits, The Duck & Rice expects that this January will be the happiest on record. So Duck The Detox, book a table, and start 2018 as you mean to go on!